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Personal Branding Disorders
by Heather Havrilesky Are you allergic to Twitter? Do you befriend people outside your target demographic? Then you may be suffering from an undiagnosed personal branding disorder. As our country...
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Japan Nuclear Crisis: The Experts Weigh In
by Heather Havrilesky Reassuring news from Japan! Our panel of experts has assured us that the current levels of radiation are not a huge threat to those outside a 50k radius of the Fukushima Daiichi...
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Donald Trump Would Run A Great, Great Country
by Heather Havrilesky Defense Secretary: Mr. President, we have a situation developing in the Middle East. President Trump: Do you like what I've done with the Oval Office? Incredible, right? Have you...
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3 Tired TV Tropes & 3 Shows That Toppled Them
by Heather Havrilesky This #NoBollocks content was produced in partnership with Newcastle Brown Ale. If you enjoy this article, won't you be a love and watch a TV commercial on the Internet? Go on,...
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The Unpublished Manuscripts Of Aaron Sorkin
by Heather Havrilesky Imagine that an intern on HBO's hit show "The Newsroom" discovers a cache of unpublished pages while sifting through Aaron Sorkin's desk drawers in search of a cease-and-desist...
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One Ring To Rule Them All
by Heather Havrilesky As Polly Esther, The Awl's existential advice columnist, Heather Havrilesky gives advice in this space every Wednesday. Here's an excerpt from her memoir Disaster Preparedness...
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Ask Polly: I Am 40. Will I Be Alone Forever?
by Heather Havrilesky Appearing here Wednesdays, Turning The Screw provides existential crisis counseling for the faint of heart. "Because the heart is a lonely hoarder." Polly, There seems to be an...
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Ask Polly: The Eventual Death of The Universe Is Making Me Anxious
by Heather Havrilesky Usually appearing here Wednesdays, Turning The Screw provides existential crisis counseling for the faint of heart. "Because time is running out!" Dear Polly, I am, by all...
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Ask Polly: Only Black Men Like Me, But I Don't Like Black Men
by Heather Havrilesky Appearing here Wednesdays, Turning The Screw provides existential crisis counseling for the faint of heart. "Because every time a door closes, a few more close." Dear Polly, I...
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Ask Polly: My Best Friend Is In Love With My Sister!
by Heather Havrilesky Appearing here Wednesdays, Turning The Screw provides existential crisis counseling for the faint of heart. "Don’t make me come over there!" Dear Polly, Recently one of my best...
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Ask Polly: My Best Friend Likes A Guy That I Really Want To Get With
by Heather Havrilesky Appearing here Wednesdays, Turning The Screw provides existential crisis counseling for the faint of heart. "Because laughter is only the best medicine if you can't afford the...
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Ask Polly: Jesus, My Struggling Writer Friends Never Shut Up!
by Heather Havrilesky Appearing here Wednesdays, Turning The Screw provides existential crisis counseling for the faint of heart. "Because you're still fucking up in the same ways you were before,...
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Ask Polly: I Desperately Need Everyone To Like Me!
by Heather Havrilesky Appearing here Wednesdays, Turning The Screw provides existential crisis counseling for the faint of heart. "Because it's all been a pack of lies." (Cue drum solo.) Dear Polly,...
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Ask Polly: My Husband Has Road Rage, An iPad Addiction, Terrible Breath, And...
by Heather Havrilesky Appearing here Wednesdays, Turning The Screw provides existential crisis counseling for the faint of heart. "Because even Bumbles bounce!" Dear Polly, I met my husband when I was...
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Five Super-Easy Tips For Dealing with the Apocalypse! From Our Partners At...
by Heather Havrilesky 1) Don't think of this as "The End." Technically, it's the end of the world. But every end brings a new beginning! Instead of focusing on the bombs and the toxic clouds and the...
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Ask Polly: I'm Afraid To Leave My Abusive Parents' House
by Heather Havrilesky Dear Polly, My birthday is coming up in a couple of days and I'm turning 25. Ever since I was young, 25 was the big year. The year I thought you become an adult, have your life...
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Ask Polly: Should I Dump My Stupid, Lazy, Alcoholic Husband?
by Heather Havrilesky Hi Polly, I have been married to my husband for two and a half years. He is a good guy, always doing favors for his family, trusts people implicitly, works hard at his job, loves...
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Ask Polly: How Do You Handle The Death of a Facebook Friend?
by Heather Havrilesky Dear Polly, What do you do when a Facebook friend who you vaguely know dies suddenly? What's the most sanity-inducing route of dealing with the fact that you have weird online...
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Ask Polly: My Boyfriend Dumped Me For Following My Dreams
by Heather Havrilesky Dear Polly, I feel like such a cliche: I can't get over my ex. We'd been dating for 2.5 years when I was awarded a full scholarship in a city across the country, to a school I'd...
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Ask Polly: How Do I Stop Meeting Arrogant, Mentally Ill Pricks?
by Heather Havrilesky Hi Polly, I finally have been hired for my dream internship, in my field, and utilizing my educational background. In a large international megapolis. But…. After years of...
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